Daydreaming can be a perfectly normal part of life - zoning out in the shower, before we fall asleep, on the train to work. But some of us cross over into dangerous territory or what we call maladaptive daydreaming where we can't pull ourselves away from the fantasy. We feel disconnected and it makes our real life feel so much less bright and enjoyable. It can cause us a lot of distress and distraction. Why is that? And why can't we stop ourselves? In today's episode, we break down:  What makes daydreaming 'maladaptive' or 'excessive'  What are the signs + the 16 item scale for maladaptive daydreaming The impact on our emotional health  Maladaptive daydreaming and creativity  Maladaptive daydreaming, trauma, anxiety and OCD  Is daydreaming a form of escapism? How to turn daydreaming into intentional visualisation  Thank you to our listeners who contributed their perspective. Happy listening!  The 16 item scale here: https://traumadissociation.com/mds  The Reddit help group: https://www.reddit.com/r/MaladaptiveDreaming/  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected]       See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sometimes the loudest critic, our biggest hater is not someone we know, it is ourselves. We are the ones who are the first to judge ourselves, to shut ourselves and our ambitions down, to say the nastiest things. In today's episode we break down why we are our own worst critic, including:  How we learn self criticism in childhood The evolutionary component to criticism  The role of the super ego  The role of comparison  Why no one is really looking at your that closely  How to embrace radical self compassion and acceptance How to use cognitive diffusion, and much more  This episode is a rerun whilst Jemma is recovering from an illness. We will be back on Friday with a brand new episode.  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In our 20s it can feel like a mad rush to find the one. If you are single and dating, you know the experience of going on what seems like dozens of dates only to be disappointed and, at the end of the day, exhausted and yet you still haven't found someone. In this episode, we discuss why that is including:  The signs your experiencing dating burnout What dating burnout and traditional burnout have in common The role of swipe based dating apps  Why this occurs and the emotional impact  The psychology of a 'dating detox'  How to have FUN when dating and how to overcome dating burnout  Listen now if nothing seems to be working when it comes too feeling frustrated and exhausted when it comes to dating in your 20s.  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected]   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

At some stage in our 20s, all of us will experience what I call 'The Loneliest Chapter' - a period where we feel detached, disconnected and isolated. Whilst this experience can feel terrible and make us question our relationships, friendships and selves, it's an important rite of passage and actually ends up teaching us a lot. In today's episode we discuss:  What is the 'lonely' chapter of our 20s? My personal journey with loneliness  What are some signs you may be in it, right now?  Why does this occur? What creates this period?  How can we learn to tolerate and enjoy solitude?  What are the benefits of loneliness?  How can we make new friends and feel like we belong?  All of that, and more... Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected]   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What is the cost of caring too much for others? Always being the person to fix everyone's problems? Never needing anyone, but secretly loving that everyone else relies on you? Well, it turns out it can cost you and your relationships a lot, and may also be a sign of high functioning codependency. High functioning codependency is much more common amongst people who are overachieving, overgiving and who have few boundaries (even if they don't know it).  In today's episode, we are joined by the originator of this term. Terri Cole is a psychotherapist and boundary expert who has been investigating this phenomena for years in her high functioning and highly successful clients. She shares the traits, behaviours, costs and ways to improve your high functioning codependency. This was one of my favourite episodes to date, happy listening! Buy Terri's new book here:  https://www.soundstrue.com/products/too-much?srsltid=AfmBOor1-0MHrQayS-ZdUANvTC5qC-T4e1Bpxotu8cti1CqOVVizKO17  Follow Terri here: @terricole  Terri's resources: https://www.terricole.com/  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Shame follows us everywhere. So many of us are bound by shame about our past, our mistakes, our identity, our looks, our decisions and choices. This can make living a meaningful and fulfilling life incredibly difficult when you have your own personal, shame bully following you everywhere. In todays episode we learn:  How shame gets implanted in us The links between shame and trauma  Shame vs. guilt How shame manifests in hidden ways  What a life without shame could look like? How to release shame by communicating with your inner child  How to shut down shame spirals  My own personal story of body shaming  Listen now! I hope this releases you from the heavy burden of shame. Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

At some stage in our 20s we'll have to make a life changing decision where the right choice is not at all clear: stay or leave my job, the country, my relationships? We can become paralysed in that moment, unable to take a step forward, not realising that doing nothing is, in itself, a decision. In today's episode we break down:  Why we struggle to make hard decisions The paradox of choice  Indecisiveness and a lack of self trust  The 'Wisest Self' thought exercise The 10/10/10 rule for making hard decisions  The role of regret and fear  Listen now if you're struggling with some hard choices in your 20s!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The right person at the wrong time might be one of the saddest kinds of love stories we come across. This person may be perfect for us, our dream partner, but factors like distance, life, obligations, emotional readiness get in the way and mean that we can't be together. Despite knowing we can't be together, we can't let go and pine after this person, wondering what we could have done differently. Or is right person, wrong time, actually just a myth? Is there ever such a thing as the 'wrong time' for our soulmate? In this episode we discuss:  The obstacles that keep people apart The psychology of 'right person, wrong time' The cognitive biases that keep us attached to someone Why we feel more bonded with some people over others  Why 'right person, wrong time' may be a myth  How to get over this person you can't stop thinking about Listen now! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Let's talk about what's been going on with my mental health recently and what's changed. This is a rather vulnerable episode so please check in with yourself before listening.  Lifeline (AUS): 13 11 14 National Suicide and Crisis Lifeline (US): 988  Samaritans (UK): 116 123 Mental health resources (worldwide): https://www.helpguide.org/find-help  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Work makes up a large component of our lives. It's estimated that 1/3 of our waking lives will be spent working, so when that environment is toxic or harmful, it takes it's toll. Especially in our 20s, a toxic workplace can be quite a negative, formative experience and leave us with poor confidence, imposter syndrome and chronic burnout. In today's episode we discuss the psychological impact of bad jobs, including:  The burnout cycle Psychological enmeshment with a workplace Long term impact on self esteem and future employment  Tips for surviving a toxic workplace Tips on how to thrive afterwards, despite the trauma  I also share my own lived experience with a toxic workplace and what I wish I'd known before. Listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

When someone criticises us we naturally feel on edge and defensive. This is because criticism threatens our ego and our sense of self and so we have a very emotional reaction. But that doesn't have to be the case. In today's episode, we break down: What makes us so sensitive to criticism Hypercritical parenting and an aversion to feedback  Rejection sensitivity and criticism  The differences between criticism and feedback How to properly approach criticism When the criticism isn't worth your time All of that and more as we unpack the psychology behind criticism. Listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected]   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

If nothing else, our 20s are a time for reinvention and transformation. We become clearer and clearer about the version of us we want to be, and hopefully more confident around expressing our authentic elves, but sometimes this is interrupted by periods of boredom, stagnation, isolation and discomfort. These are all signs that something in our lives needs to change, and it needs to change now. In today's episode we break down five ways to reinvent yourself during your 20s, including:  Theory of opposites Visualisation and choosing the 'theme' for your next era The timeline for change  The power of risk + microrisks  Changing 'what if' thinking into 'what else' or 'so what?' + more  Listen now when you're ready for transformation. Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Flirting! Usually thought of as something used to express romantic or physical interest may actually be the secret to unlocking more connections than you can ever imagine: platonic and romantic. In today's episode we break down the psychology of flirting, including how to gain confidence in your flirting ability, the flirt languages or styles, why flirting is all about connection and low expectations and, of course, how to bring back flirting into a long term relationship.  We are joined by the Flirt Coach, Benjamin Camras, to be the expert on this episode. Benjamin has been a flirt coach for thousands, runs his own podcast on flirting, called Flirtations, and gives us his best tips and tricks for embracing the power of the 'flirt'. Listen now!  Follow Benjamin here: @benjamincamras Listen to Flirtations here: https://open.spotify.com/show/3Ti023cM762SVaQOZrdWlv?si=4ab574c92b5f4339  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We all get anxious at times, but what we forget in those moments is that anxiety is just there to protect us, it's trying to do its job, and the more we lean in and play along, the more we start to feel in control again. In today's episode, we break down the four ways I've made my anxiety work for me, including:  Turning anxiety into excitement The certainities list method The personification method  Channeling anxious energy into creative energy + more  If you're someone who struggles with ongoing anxiety, this episode will hopefully provide you with a new perspective, or at least a refresher on what we do know about the way anxiety effects us. Listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Limerance - the state of having undeniable feelings for someone who does not feel the same way - feels so much like love but can be so confusing, because deep down we know this person is probably not the one. Despite that we find it impossible to move on, impossible to disconnect or detach despite our best efforts because our affections for this person feel so permanently wired into our brain. Today we talk about why that may be, including:  The first ever studies into limerance The 4 stages of limerance  The addictive explanation for limerance  Limerance, attachment style, fantasy and ADHD What the long term emotional impacts of limerance are  How to recover + 4 tips for moving on Listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: [email protected]   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Our attention is constantly being pulled in every direction: we're thinking about the past, overthinking the future, getting notifications from our phones, information from our environment. When was the last time you truly slowed down and enjoyed the present? When was the last time you savoured the moment like you do a nice meal, or a sleep in? Today we are discussing the power of mindfulness, and the power of staying present, including:  The three biggest enemies to staying present The psychology of disassocation The psychological benefits of living in the moment What the world's biggest happiness study says about staying present  The 3x3x3 mindfulness method  Embracing your 'romance' moments, and more  Listen now to learn about the art of noticing, staying present, and feeling life fully.  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg  Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: [email protected]   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Money is as much psychological and emotional as it is a physical resource. For that reason, sometimes money and our mental health don't always mix. Many people think that we only experience financial anxiety or financial stress when we are struggling with money, but it turns out that it's a lot more complicated than that. In today's episode, we break down the interactions between our psychology and our mental health, including:  The difference between objective and subjective financial stress The long term impacts of worrying about money  Why this generation is more concerned with money than ever before  Our 9 money languages or archetypes and how to identify yours  How to manage financial stress in your 20s  How to override your financial impulses and poor money decisions All of that and so much more! Listen now.  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg  Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: [email protected]  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Our fear of being perceived is more than just social anxiety, its a real phobia around being scrutinised, observed and primarily judged by others. It's also greatly limiting your potential and ability to be your true self. But there is a way through, there is a way to escape the constant fixation on what others are thinking about you. In today's episode, we discuss:  The origins and effects of scopophobia How our fear of being perceived is both a social and specific phobia Why do we worry about what other people think? Perfectionism and our fear of being perceived  The impact of early childhood experiences  Three mental shifts to overcome your fear of being perceived  Listen now for all that and more!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: [email protected] omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Loving someone who struggles with their mental health can be devastating. You want to do all you can to help, but no one has ever taught you how or what exactly you should say, how you can help, the right questions to ask. In today's episode we break down the biggest pieces of advice I have for people who are supporting someone they love with their mental health from education, to understanding our processing languages, listening, advocating and setting boundaries! Listen now.  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: [email protected]   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In today's episode we break down the controversy but also the beauty of female friendship - why exactly are they so difficult? Or is that all a myth? It turns out what makes female friendships sometimes so difficult is also what makes them so rewarding - the intensity, the level of disclosure, the expectations, the bond! We also discuss how society tries to undermine the sacred nature of female friendship through competition, comparison and the cursed role of male attention, but also how to ensure healthy, long lasting connections with your girlfriends.  A big thank you to the listeners who contributed to this episode! Listen now.  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: [email protected]   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The life of the highly sensitive person is often misunderstood. Highly sensitive aren't just people who cry too much or get overwhelmed, take things too personally: they actually take in so much of the world that it can be too much. They feel everything, from joy to sadness, so immediately and profoundly. They are also so in tune with the emotions of all those around them that sometimes it can be too much. Today we break down the psychology of the highly sensitive person, including:  What are the core assessment criteria for identifying if you're highly sensitive? What causes someone to be highly sensitive?  The genetic, personality, parental and temperment contribution  The link between sensitivity, IQ, EQ and creativity + the gentle superpower of sensitive people  Do highly sensitive people have more empathy?  The link between neurodivergence and sensitivity  How to explain your sensitivity to others  How to make the world work for your gentle, feeling soul, and so much more! This episode is FULL of tips, research and studies. Listen now!  The assessment: https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: [email protected]   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This episode might be the wakeup call we all need that our traditional notions of success aren't working. We have been conditioned to see success as individualistic, full of sacrifice, centred around discipline, productivity and all about image and looking impressive. Actually, success is a lot more nuanced. Some of the most successful people in the world as the least happy because success does not allow us to prioritise what really matters to us and drives us. In this episode we break down:  The problems with our idea of success Overachiever burnout  Why being successful doesn't always equal happiness  The alternative and how to find your purpose What makes a successful life in your 20s Listen now! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: [email protected] omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

All of us find ourselves remincising on the 'good old days' every now and then, but sometimes we can find ourselves getting trapped in the memories of the past and feeling like it will never be as good as it was. This is the nostalgia trap and it can keep us from being present, from enjoying our current season, or making new memories, it can also lead to nostalgic depression. It can be particulalry hard in our 20s when everyone is telling us these are 'the best years of our lives'. In today's episode we talk about how to find a healthy balance between remembering and enjoying the moment, including:  Early ideas of nostalgia  The reason we feel nostalgia Are we more nostalgic now than ever? Can we have too much nostalgia?  Peter Pan Syndrome Chronic and depressive nostalgia  How to be more present + tips for managing our nostalgia  Listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: [email protected] omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Journalling is seen as one of the holy grails when it comes to trying to improve your mental health and emotional wellbeing, but what about it is so great? The people who love it, absolutely swear by it, but where do we even begin? How can we make it less like a chore, and more joyous? In today's episode, we break down the psychology and fundamentals of journalling, including:  The history of journalling and writing therapy The physical, mental and emotional benefits How to find the right journalling technique for you  The benefits of 'ugly' journalling  Why journalling can be so difficult to start The FOUR fundamental principles for enjoying journalling  My favourite journalling prompts Alternatives when writing isn't your thing  Listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg  Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: [email protected]   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Our fear of being alone forever and never finding the right one is scary, but it's also pretty natural. Whether you have never dated before, or are worried that you have missed your chance for true, long term love, it can be hard to imagine ourselves finding the right person without getting really caught up in the dating process. Today, let's talk about how to overcome your fear of being alone or ending up single, including:  The fear of missing out The impact of social pain  The societal narrative towards singlehood  Single shaming language + the role of ambiguous loss  Does a fear of being alone make us less selective?  How to be self partnered and actually LOVE it! All of that and some much more! Listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: [email protected]  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

One of the biggest questions we seem to encounter in our 20s and beyond is: what is my calling? What is my purpose, my mission, my passion? So many of us are left feeling panicked and like we are wasting time looking for the answer. Shouldn't this be obvious? Shouldn't I know by now? Actually, finding your purpose is not as simple as it looks, but in today's episode we dive into the Japanese concept of Ikigai:  What are you good at? What do you love doing? What does the world need? What can you get paid for?  We break down exactly to find your answer to each of these elements and hopefully feel closer to your calling + 3 bonus exercises for finding more clarity on what drives you. Listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbe Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: [email protected]  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Resentment is sometimes labelled as an ugly or bad emotion, something that is derived from a sense of entitlement. In actuality, resentment is a really useful emotion, it serves as an emotional alarm, it teaches us what we value, and it can help us understand our own expectations and sense of self worth even more. Despite that, when we don't manage our resentment well it can also come to harm our relationships or cause us to be too rash. In today's episode, we break down the psychology of resentment, including: Why we experience resentment What you resentment may be telling you  Our 3 ways to respond to resentment  How to release resentment and move through it  Listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: [email protected]  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Survival mode is, at its core, a stress response. When our minds and our bodies are put under extreme stress or believe we are in danger, we can enter a state where all we care about is getting through the next day. This can turn us into a person we're not and make us lose the enjoyment and love for life, but also feel overwhelmed by constant panic and anxiety. In today's episode, we discuss how to break free of survival mode, the difference between our learning brain and our survival brain, why we find ourselves here to begin with, what's happening in our brain and our bodies and the best advice, tips and therapies for getting back into safe mode.  Listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: [email protected]   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We all want long lasting, passionate, meaningful love and in our 20s it can hard to figure out exactly how to find that. With so many 'rules' around what to do, pacing, when to become exclusive, when to say 'I love you', when to move in together, it seems the secret is to go slow and build emotional intimacy. In other words, embrace the power of the slow burn, the 'slowmance' and low pressure beginnings.  In this episode we are joined by Hinge's Love & Connection Expert, Moe Ari Brown as they discuss how to slow down and properly build a foundation for sustainable love, why we can often be overwhelmed by the need to speed things up and jump right in, ignoring intuition out of our fear of rejection, and where that can lead us. That and so (SO) much more. Listen now!  Follow Moe here: @loveoutproud View the new Hinge report: https://hinge.co/press/2024-GenZ-Report Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast here: @thatpsychologypodcast   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Is the secret to a happier, less stressful, more connected life actually play? A lot of the research is telling us so! As we get older sometimes we lose a bit of our joy, awe and wonder, and the time we have for our friendships becomes more restricted by work, obligations, distance, commitment and seriousness. In today's episode, let's talk about why the solution to that may be to bring back adult playdates, including:  The psychology behind why play is important The loneliness epidemic  Why our sense of connection has become disrupted  Our 8 play personalities  The power of parallel play  Microhabits for creating playfulness and fun, and so much more!  Listen now! And don't forget to schedule your playdate!! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected]  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Our self doubts are what is keeping us in our own way. It is the foundation for our inner critic to tell us: you're not good enough, you're not talented enough, intelligent beautiful, hardworking to have the life and success you want. When we let our self doubts take control, it often means that we end up self handicapping or sabotaging before we get to the start line. In today's episode we are going to talk about the psychology of self doubt and how to silence those false beliefs, including:  The origin of false beliefs in childhood experiences The impact of bullying on adult identity  Overcoming failure and setbacks  Imposter syndrome + self sabotage  The power of a persona + the batman effect  Doubting your own doubts  Asking 'why not you?', and so much more Listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquires: [email protected]  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Today on the podcast we are talking about toxic positivity and the problem with always being positive and putting a fluffy, warm, positive spin on things. Often our unrealistic optimism comes from a good place and our desire to be happy all the time but any person knows that isn't always possible. We break down:  The reason we gravitate towards toxic positivity What toxic positivity looks like The impact of wellness and self help content The consequences for our mental health  The consequences for our emotional intelligence  Why people who accept negative emotions are ACTUALLY happier How to practice emotional acceptance and healthy positivity  All of that and so much more, listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We all know what red flags are, they tend to be universal at any age, but there are some redflags that are specific to our 20s, certain features of a relationship during this decade to look out for even if they don't look concerning at first. On today's episode we talk about the five biggest red flags for relationships in our 20s, including:  Relationships that stop you from having experiences Relationships that cause emotional chaos  Relationships that don't celebrate or encourage you All or nothing relationships  Fatal attractor relationships  We also explore the psychology and of course the research behind why these can be so damaging to help us find more sustainable and healthy love during this decade. Listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg  Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: [email protected]  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The period after graduation can be really difficult, filled with emotions like grief, anxiety, worry about the future, loneliness and nostalgia as we leave the structure and comfort of college and university for the big, confusing real world. In today's episode we break down the psychology of the post-graduation blues, including:  What defines this experience How long does it last?  The loss of friends as well as security and stability  What triggers our unease How we can embrace the fear and uncertainty  Setting realistic goals for our first year post graduation  This and so much more, all with some amazing advice and wisdom from our guest, the therapist Liz Kelly, author of the book 'This Book Is Cheaper Than Therapy'. Listen now!  Buy Liz book here: https://www.amazon.com.au/This-Book-Cheaper-Than-Therapy/dp/1962305007  Follow Jemma here: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast here: @thatpsychologypodcast  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Very few of us ever receive an education on coping. We are taught bad things happen, we are taught pointless math equations, we are taught to grin and bear it, but not effective psychological ways of integrating stressful, painful, frustrating experiences. In this episode, we break down the psychology of coping mechanisms, including:  Problem focused vs. emotion focused coping Maladaptive vs. adaptive coping  Our most common defence mechanisms  How to stop numbing ourselves to our experiences  How to consciously deal with hard things in life  Our coping statements  Freud, Carl Jung and many more  Listen now for a comprehensive deep dive into coping in your 20s and beyond.  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: [email protected]  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Conversations seem like they should be the easiest thing in the world, but we all know that sometimes that is not the case! Mental distractions, running out of things to talk about, feeling a bit off, all some of the roadblocks we face. In today's episode we break down FIVE tips to have better conversations:  The 2:1 question ratio The fast friends protocol  Story topping and bright siding  The 5 minute urge  The liking gap  Listen now for more so we can all be having better conversations in whatever area of life! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Love bombing has been a hot topic as of recent, but what does it ACTUALLY mean or entail? In today's episode we are breaking down all of the psychology of love bombing, including:  The cultish origin of love bombing The three stages of love bombing  Why people love bomb? The interaction between narcissism and love bombing  Intensity addiction and love bombing  The five questions for determining: is it love or lovebombing?  We also dive into why it can be so easy to get swept up by these individuals and behaviours, how to know it when you see it and the strength it takes to walk away.  Listen now!  For online help: https://whiteribbon.org.au/helplines/  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected]    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Since the beginning of this show I've been super open about my mental health so I thought I'd share an update (the bad, the good and the really good). Let's normalise talking openly and honestly about what we're going through even when its not pretty  or aesthetic. Thank you for all the support! Mental Health support in your area: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The thought of having children in our 20s feels like an incredibly adult decision, and is one a lot of us probably don't consider. We want to protect our youth and our freedom a little bit longer, or perhaps have decided we probably will never want children. But whether you want to have children or not, having a clear understanding of your future intentions or choices, your reproductive health, the kind of person who might make a good partner, and therefore parent, is important. More information, more foresight actually equals greater freedom and sometimes time to decide.  We break down:  Why you should be thinking in your 20s The pros and cons of having children in your 20s  The argument for NOT having children  Fertility Milestone anxiety and the pressure to find someone  Your stories of pregnancy, parenthood and fertility in your 20s Listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: [email protected]  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Struggling with our self worth can often impact how deserving we feel of love. This sense that we may be 'unloveable' causes us to miss out on healthy, fulfilling relationships, self sabotage and stay with people who don't deserve us. In today's episode, we discuss:  The origins of why we feel unworthy of love Childhood wounds  Early romantic scripts and teen romance  Repeated rejection and shame The consequences of feeling unloveable  Repetition of toxic relationships How to restore or rediscover your sense of self worth and self love  And so much more. Listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast: @thatpsychologypodcast   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

All of us have insecurities when it comes to our appearance, but what happens when these become obsessive and a point of fixation? In today's episode we break down the psychology and pathology of body dysmorphia, including:  The origins in childhood experiences Family history and influence  The differences in expression between men and women The relationship between body dysmorphia and cosmetic surgery  The influence of toxic gym, diet culture and 'bigorexia' How false beliefs influence behaviour  Dating with body dysmorphia, and more Listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We all want to be happier, but are probably sick of hearing about 'exercising more, eating better, sleeping 8 hours'. In today's episode we break down FIVE evidence based tips that are simple, accessible, actionable and inexpensive for becoming a happier person and the research that proves it:  Focus on platonic love over romantic love Small acts of kindness + how we are spending our money wrong and why its making us less happy  The importance of a project  The healing power of nature + what bacteria and dirt have to do with it  Let yourself wallow  Listen now!  Buy notebooks here: https://the-psychology-of-your-20s.myshopify.com/  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast Instagram here: @thatpsychologypodcast See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Going 'no contact' after a breakup or relationship breakdown is promoted as one of the best ways to move on from an ex. But why is that the case, and what is the psychology? Is it always that easy? In today's episode we break down the psychology of going 'no contact': why it works, the science, when it's necessary and how to stay committed, even when it feels impossible. Listen now! Our notebooks are OUT NOW: https://the-psychology-of-your-20s.myshopify.com/  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You're not imagining it! The job market is getting harder, especially for 20-somethings who are entering the job market for the first time and trying to find their path. In today's episode we break down the psychological toll that the job hunt takes on us, the constant rejections, unrewarded effort, resentment and frustration. We also discuss why our generation has it tougher and it's not just a you problem but also how to improve your odds and keep your head up! All that and more, listen now :)  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Our mother wounds represent the unprocessed trauma and insecurities we pick up from the dynamic we each have with the women who raise us and shape us. In today's episode we break down the psychology of our mother wounds including their origin, their impact and their manifestation, from our body confidence to our competition with other women, our ability to trust and connect, our fear of disapproval and chronic people pleasing.  We also explore ways to heal this wound, both in collaboration with our mother and on our own. Listen now for more!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast     See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We often think the secret to not being passive in our lives is to fill up our days, set countless goals, always be striving for progress and productivity. What if we told you the secret was slowing down? In today's episode I am joined by Caroline and Ann Catherine from Girls with Goals as we discuss:  What it beens to be passive vs. active vs. intentional How to create momentum  Why big, long term goals aren't the secret to success  How to develop a healthier relationship with yourself and your spare time Follow Girls with Goals here: @girlswithgoalspod Find Girls with Goals wherever you get your podcasts.  Follow Jemma here: @jemmasbeg  Follow the podcast here: @thatpsychologypodcast   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In today's episode we're going old school, back to a good old fashioned chatty sit down episode and life update. I have been recovering from a pretty terrible bout of tonsilitis and it's made me realise...I have a toxic relationship with productivity. Even when I'm sick I can't slow down, and I don't think I'm alone.  We also discuss how I'm finding living alone, a little relationship update and how it feels to have finished my book! All that and more, listen now!    Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

How can you tell if you're codependent or just really close to someone? If you are enmeshed or just reliant on their support? Feeling happy and stable in a loving relationship, or losing your independence? There are a lot of misconceptions and misunderstandings when it come to codependent relationships, especially in our 20s and in today's episode we break down all you need to know and more, including:  The roots of codependency in childhood and attachment theory Signs of codependency  Codependency v. dependency  How to heal your need for intensity and trauma bonding  Healing and restoring a codependent bond  Listen now! Today's episode is a rerun of Episode 69 whilst Jemma is recovering from a sudden illness. New episodes will be back on Friday, happy listening.    Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

So many of us are struggling to stay focused and concentrate in an environment of constant distraction and temptation and it's causing a lot of us to feel unproductive and undisciplined. In today's episode we break down why our attention spans seem to be rapidly declining, we discuss:  The Gold Fish myth The average attention span from 2004-2017  The impact of short form content The impact of COVID lockdowns Overstimulation and rising ADHD diagnoses  Attentional cycles and our circadian rhythm  Tips for regaining your focus + social media rules  Listen now to reclaim your focus and concentration and reverse your declining attention span.  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Attachment theory is often misunderstood but when we have the correct knowledge and information it can transform how we relate to others. In today's episode we break down one of these styles, the avoidant attachment, along with it's two components: avoidant dismissive and avoidant fearful. We discuss how this style develops, its expression, the difference in prevalence and behaviours between men and women and how we can move forward and heal an avoidant pattern.  We are joined in today's episode by Thais Gibson, the founder of The Personal Development School and expert in attachment theory. Unlock your free trial using this link: www.personaldevelopmentschool.com/freetrial  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg  Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  Follow Thais and The Personal Development School on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thepersonaldevelopmentschool/?hl=en     See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We have a lot of opportunities to feel behind in our 20s, especially when it comes to our careers, our finances and our relationships. In todays episode we break down why so many of us (roughly 80% of 20 something year olds) feeling like we're falling short of expectations, as well as how we can manage these feelings and enjoy our path through life without comparing it to someone others. We discuss: The competitiveness of this generation The wunderkind phenomena  Career anxiety and starting over  Relationship and dating inexperience  The pandemic skip  How to feel more sure of your own path and progress  AND, we hear from you, the listeners, about your experiences. Listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We have found some pretty amazing ways to observe human behaviour and from it, discovered some especially interesting things about how we operate, who we are at our core, our irrational beliefs and so much more. In today's episode, we break down five of my favourite psychology studies of all time from jam, to mental escapism and binge watching TV, how many friends we actually need, the healing power of nature and the origins of imposter syndrome. Listen now!  Study One: The Stanford Jam Experiment https://faculty.washington.edu/jdb/345/345%20Articles/Iyengar%20%26%20Lepper%20(2000).pdf Study Two: In your 20s it's quantity, in your 30s its quality  https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2015-10764-001  Study Three: Loneliness, Escapism, and Identification With Media Characters  https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychology/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2021.785970/full  Study Four: The Imposter Phenomenon in High Achieving Women https://www.paulineroseclance.com/pdf/ip_high_achieving_women.pdf  Study Five: Effects of Coastal Environment on Well-being  https://www.walshmedicalmedia.com/open-access/effects-of-the-coastal-environment-on-wellbeing-jczm-1000421.pdf    Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  Business enquiries: [email protected]    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Finding the joy in your own company is one of the most healing, rewarding and fulfilling things we can do. It's also really difficult in an age of FOMO, constant distraction, stimulation and fear of boredom or loneliness. In today's episode we break down exactly why you need to fall back in love with your alone time, the amazing benefits and HOW to do it. Listen now!  Follow us on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbegSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Social comparison is the thief of joy - it will make us question everything that we have, doubt our own abilities, steal our sense of gratitude and peace. It also sometimes feels impossible to escape, especially in our 20s when we look to others for confirmation that we are doing something right. In today's episode we break down the 5 rules you need to stop comparing yourself to others and embrace the benefits of healthy social comparison, this includes:  Don't unfollow, don't suppress, recognise and expand Keep your judgements realistic  Do things for YOU first Water your own grass  Comparison as a motivator  Listen now to learn how you can control your urge to compare yourself to others!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg  Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Our inability to make decisions is wasting our time, keeping us acting from a place of fear and stuck in a life we don't want! It's also not entirely our fault and often stems from unconscious mechanisms, neuroticism and fears that we haven't recognised. In today's episode we break down:  Why you struggle to make decisions The consequences of our chronic indecisiveness  Perfection and indecision  Choice overload  A fear of failure  How to overcome your indecisiveness using the 80/20 rule The 'trusted advisor' method  Listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg  Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

About 2/3rds of couples start off as friends according to recent research. But developing feelings for a friend isn't always a happily ever after situation. In today's episode we break down why it is that we fall in love with our friends, the principles of attraction such as the similarity liking effect and mere exposure effect, whether to say anything or keep it to yourself, managing the pain of rejection or social loss and your best tips for protecting the friendship and your own heart. Listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg  Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast     See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sleep is one of our most vital functions but how many of us actually know that much about it, the links to our physical functioning, mental health, relationships and overall wellbeing. What about some of the strange experiments they've conducted to investigate dreams or how long we can go without sleep? In today's episode we take a deep dive into the psychology of sleep, including:  Why we need sleep? What actually is REM sleep? The Russian Sleep Experiment  Sleep debt  Sleep as a form of self sabotage Revenge bedtime procrastination  The impact of blue light and screens in the bedroom  How to improve your sleep hygiene and more  Listen now for when you want to maximise your shut eye!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg  Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected]    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

More and more 20 something year olds are choosing to live with their parents; we are moving out later and a lot of us are boomeranging (coming back home after moving out). In today's episode we explore the emotional and psychological impacts of living with your parents in your 20s, why more of us are living at home because of financial anxiety or housing insecurity, how to handle conflict with your parents whilst you're still living under their roof and 6 tips for a successful living at home situation + some of your stories, advice and the benefits.  Listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg  Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: [email protected]    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We lose our spark and love for life for many reasons: burnout, mental ill health, people pleasing, a breakup. When we do it can feel like life gets very boring, it loses colour, we lose interest and we can become cynical towards all of the small joys and brilliance of being alive and being human. In this episode we break down six tips for getting your spark back:  The power of rest Choosing to live light versus live heavy  Reconnecting with your inner child + play  Seeking inspiration in the mundane and The Alchemist  Exercise + the healing power of nature  Ignoring the urge to compare  Listen now for when you're in a rut or have lost your spark!    Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast     See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You're not going to get along with everyone and one of those people you don't get along with might end up dating someone you love i.e your friend. Disliking your friends partner often stems from one of three reasons: your dating preferences don't match, you're experiencing platonic jealousy, you're genuinely worried about this other person being bad for your friend, exploitative or abusive. We talk about all three of these outcomes in today's episode along with what to do in response: do you stay silent or speak up?  Listen now!    Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Social media is impacting our mental health in ways we are not ready or willing to acknowledge, and it's time we talk about it. In today's episode we discuss all the psychology of social media and how it is embedded in our social lives, our relationships, our beliefs, our daily routines, our news and our self worth. We break down how social media was designed to be addictive, how it captures more of our time than we think, the differences between people who have been on social media for over 10 years versus who have never been and what we can do about it. We also discuss the role of algorithms and misinformation. There is so much negativity spread online and innate need to compare ourselves to others, but I also believe we can have a positive and moderated relationship with these platforms. Listen now.   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Father wounds arise from a disorganised or complicated relationship with our father figure - either due to them being physically or emotionally absent, harsh and critical, unfeeling or abusive and can result in a number of dysfunctional behaviours and emotional patterns as we grow older. In this episode we are breaking down the psychology of father wounds and discussing:  The origins of father wounds and the role of generational trauma Mother wounds versus father wounds  Attachment theory and father archetypes  Father hunger and father replacements  Is forgiveness the only answer?  The power of inner child healing  All of that and more, listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  Business enquiries: [email protected]    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In this episode we are joined by clinical psychologist and author of 'The Defining Decade' to talk about all the frustrations, stressors, misconceptions and hard moments of our 20s and why it's only going to get BETTER from here. We talk about:  Shifting from a 'what if' to a 'what is' or 'what else' mindset Why we fear uncertainity  Milestone anxiety  Sliding versus deciding  Catastrophic thinking  Insecure and anxious attachment styles vs. insecure and anxious moments And so much more  Listen now to hear all of Dr Meg's amazing advice and hear a bit about her new book, coming out next month.    Link to The Defining Decade: https://www.amazon.com.au/Defining-Decade-Meg-Jay/dp/0446561754  Pre-order Meg's new book: https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/The-Twentysomething-Treatment/Meg-Jay/9781668012291  Follow Jemma here: @jemmasbeg  Follow the podcast here: @thatpsychologypodcast     See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sometimes all we want to do is a have a big, old fashioned sob and when we can't it leads us feeling emotionally pent up, defective and frustrated. There's an explanation for why we go through periods where we are unable to cry. In today's episode we discuss:  The evolutionary function of crying Crying as an attachment behaviour  The difference between basal, reflex and emotional tears  The 4 major reasons we struggle with crying  How to heal your connection with your emotions  How we process emotions through the body, and more. Listen now when you're in need of an emotional catharsis or could really do with a few tears.  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Self discipline is the key ingredient to unlocking everything you want in life. But despite that many of us treat it like its optional and believe the narrative that self discipline requires perfection, requires sacrifice and is too hard. Actually, self discipline is anything but, it is actually the road of least resistance. In this episode we break down 5 tips for building self discipline in any area of life:  Understanding your motivation Leveraging social accountability and desirability bias  The power of micro habits  Hacking our dopamine systems through instant versus delayed gratification Shifting from learned helplessness to learned industriousness  All of that and more! Listen now!   Follow the podcast: @thatpsychologypodcast Follow Jemma: @jemmasbegSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Love is scary. There are so many opportunities to be hurt, to be let down, to have thing turn out in a way we never wanted them to. But it's also one of the best things in live and brings incredible joy and fulfilment. Why is it that some of us avoid the experience all together. In today's episode we are going to discuss the fear of intimacy in all its forms. We will discuss:  Signs you have a fear of intimacy (serial dating, situationships, emotional avoidance) Childhood and early relationship wounds The fear of engulfment and overbearing parents  How insecurity drives protectiveness  Our misconceptions about love  4 steps to healing your fear of intimacy We also discuss some of the ways people in their 20s might not realise they have a fear of intimacy and why our society sometimes celebrates the things that keep us in a state of avoidance. All of that and more, listen now!    Follow the podcast: @thatpsychologypodcast  Follow Jemma: @jemmasbeg     See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This International Women's Day as part of iHeart's Women Take the Mic Initiative, I'm bringing on my Mum for a vulnerable chat about our relationship as mother and daughter, what she's learned from being a mother, what she would do differently, life lessons and her success in a male dominated field. We discuss everything from motherhood, child-parent dynamics, feminism and career advice. It's a beautiful conversation, one that I'll hold dearly for a long time and we hope you enjoy, listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week we are discussing the ups and downs of living alone in your 20s: from the freedom and independence, to the loneliness and social isolation, financial anxiety and stress, but the authenticity and emotional maturity that comes with it. We talk about:  Why being alone doesn't make you lonely Sliders versus deciders - why you should wait before moving in with a partner Cognitive distortions and overspending  Lifestyle creep  Habits for building social connection and community How to successfully live alone  All that and more, listen now!    Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow The Psychology of your 20s on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast     See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

When we experience healthy love for the first time after years of unsettling, unhealthy, toxic relationships, one of the first reactions we can have is "why does this feel so boring?" Often we confuse safety with a lack of passion, or assume that just because this person doesn't activate our nervous system, we are missing the spark. This is often left over from past relationships where we have confused anxiety with excitement.  In this episode, we bring on Sarah Yudkin, the founder of You Love and You Learn to break down the relationship anxiety that comes with experiencing healthy love for the first time and how to dissect your relationship OCD, the unconscious ways we sabotage relationships and all that comes with it. Listen now.    Sarah's website: https://www.youloveandyoulearn.com/  Follow Sarah on Instagram: @youloveandyoulearn Follow the Podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Follow me on Instagram: @jemmasbeg    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hosted by two unapologetically black women with an opinion who talk back, TamBam and AJ are helping women maneuver through the Sea of Men! "We Talk Back” podcast is here to guide femininity to its ultimate greatness. We Talk Back podcast is giving their listeners the raw and unfiltered comedic gift of repartee. With thought-provoking conversations about sex, relationships, and money with a dash of danger and glitter. TamBam & AJ will also help listeners seeking non-professional guidance, as these ladies deliver advice and their personal thoughts on topics. Listen here and subscribe to We Talk Back on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In this week's episode we discuss the curse of being an overachiever. Society celebrates us for our successes, for our ability to work hard, push ourselves and constantly be the best. But this sometimes has contradictory consequences whereby the more we invest in our achievements, the less satisfaction and fulfillment we feel. We break down the paradox of being an overachiever and explore:  The impact of being labelled a 'gifted child' Golden child syndrome and family expectations External validation The overachiever's identity crisis  The burnout cycle  Learning your limits and redefining success  Listen now!    Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/     See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Dating in our 20s can feel like a minefield, a lot of people don't know what they want, what they like, we get ghosted, we get stood up, and then there are the first dates. First dates can feel intimidating but today we are breaking down my 10 tips to have the best first dates of your life. By adopting the mindset that you are there to learn more about yourself and have a fun experience, we take first dates off a pedestal and lower the stakes. Dating is a skill than anything else, it is something that we get better at over time, so what are some ways that we can have better first dates from a psychological perspective, how can we really draw these people in, feel our best, feel most charismatic and in our power but also able to get what we want out of this experience: from the scent you wear, to the location you should choose, the nonverbal cues you should be putting out, how to leverage the power of suspense, all of that and more in this episode. Listen now.    Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/     See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

On today's episode we bring on the wonderful, Katy Bellotte, to discuss everything love, dating and relationship in our 20s. We discuss what it feels like to have never had a relationship in your 20s, the milestone anxiety and societal pressure that makes us to feel like we need to settle for someone we're not fully committed to, feeling behind and what it feels like to finally find the one. Katy also talks moving to New York City, what it's like to live your life online and managing expectations around social media. Listen now!  Follow Katy: https://www.instagram.com/katybellotte/?hl=en  Follow The Psychology of your 20s: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/     See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

A lot of us in our 20s feel the urge to upend everything and move to a new city - maybe for work, for a partner or just for the pure adventure of a new experience and environment. So in this episode we're going to break down why our 20s are perhaps the best time to make this major life change, from the lack of external responsibilities to the psychological benefits it brings, including self reflection, promoting a growth mindset and realising our ideal selves. We'll also explore why the urge to move to a new city really reflects our innate novelty seeking behaviour and why some people, the so called 'serial movers', can never seem to stay in one place for long. And finally, what are some of the practical ways we can actually do this and build community, maintain financial security, avoid feeling isolated? And what exactly is the so-called '6 month' rule? All of that and more, listen now!  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/  Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

It's been a while since my last life update so I thought we would take a bit of a breather and sit down for a nice chatty episode, just for you all the loyal podcast listeners, discussing all the recent changes and surprises that have been transpiring in my life as of late. From discovering what a healthy relationship looks like after years of tragic dating stories, the end of my single era, to moving to NYC and writing a book (!!!) there is so much to cover, alongside answering some of your burning questions. Listen now!  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/  Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Increasingly, those of us in our 20s are facing an exceeding pressure to be exceptional and have a million accomplishments and accolades under our belt. If we are not successful, what are we worth? Examples like the Forbes 30 under 30, the wunderkind phenomena and young success stories all make us feel like we're not achieving enough or are falling behind. Today we're going to break down exactly why we feel this way, using theories around self determination, observational learning and social comparison. We'll also examine how we can break away from our need to be defined by our successes using practices like mindfullness, examining our online persona and capturing delight to use our 20s to explore rather than excel. Listen now!  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/  Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Each of us deals with feelings of embarrassment, awkwardness and feeling social self conscious every now and then. But social anxiety can cause us a level of emotional, mental and physical discomfort that disrupts out ability to build authentic connection and can hold us back. In this episode we break down the psychology of social anxiety, particularly deconstructing the belief that everyone is judging us or that the opinions of others matter. We look at the distinction between everyday anxiety and a social phobia, the links to perfectionism and overthinking and methods for managing our social anxiety including the "so what" mentality and treating our anxiety like excitement rather than fear to allow us to pursue social authenticity over perfectionism. All that and more, listen now! Subscribe to my Patreon to support the show: https://www.patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s My Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/ See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In this episode, I want to talk about depression. And not just from a psychological and scientific perspective but also from a personal perspective, sharing parts of my story. It's not something I've talked about much on the podcast but recently I've really come to terms with my own shame and stigma and I want to discuss where I'm at now, the journey I've been on and how its impacted the life I've created for myself in my 20s. We're also going to explore some of the key principles and theories behind the origins of depression, misconceptions, the different forms of depression, historical recognition of this condition, whether exercise really is a 'cure', and the new frontier of depression research, including the proposed use of psychedelics and ketamine.  If you or someone you know needs help, please see the below resources:  Beyond Blue - https://www.beyondblue.org.au/ Black Dog Institute - https://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au/resources-support/depression/  Lifeline (for immediate over the phone support) - 13 11 14  For further reading, please see the below articles:  Genetic Factors in Major Depression - https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6065213/  Childhood Trauma and Its Relationship to Chronic Depression in Adulthood - https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4677006/ Depression as a disease of modernity - https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3330161/  Effects of Naturalistic Psychedelic Use on Depression, Anxiety, and Well-Being - https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyt.2022.831092/full  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

It’s something we all inevitably experience in our dating lives, the pain of a break-up, saying goodbye to someone we loved and then, one day, the realisation that your ex has moved on and is with someone new. It can be incredibly confronting and painful, so today we're going to explore exactly why it hurts, even if deep down, we know we were never going to work. We will dive into the psychological ideas and theories behind rosy retrospection, social comparison, our self worth and the emotional and psychological closure that occurs when our ex moves on. We also examine the role of the rebound and why it’s important to take time to heal before getting into a new relationship, as explained by the addiction model of heartbreak and stages of grief. But finally, what next? Now that the chapter has finally closed, how do we move on and heal in a healthy manner and ignore those lingering self doubts that everything we had with our ex, they're now having with someone. All that and more in this episode, listen now!  Patreon: https://patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/?hl=en See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

So often in life, we are our own worst enemies. The meanest and loudest voice in our head is our own. So why are we so hard on ourselves? In this episode we break down the psychological underpinnings behind our inner critic, from the proposed evolutionary role of negative self talk, to the influence of our upbringing including the distinction between conditional and unconditional positive regard, parental expectations and childhood bullying. We examine how social comparison and overthinking can contribute to a poor self perception but, also, how we can adopt the methods of radical self compassion and cognitive diffusion to silence that inner voice and be free from self judgement. Listen now!  Patreon: https://patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s Harvard Business Review article: https://hbr.org/2021/05/stop-being-so-hard-on-yourself Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/?hl=en&__coig_restricted=1See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The term 'gaslighting' has grown in popularity in recent years and become part of our shared psychobabble, giving our generation the language to describe a pattern of behaviour that has existed for centuries. This week on the podcast, we explore a recent story in the media on gaslighting and dive into what gaslighting actually means from a psychological perspective. We explore the origins of the term, how it references pop culture, the six behavioural patterns adopted by gaslighters and the links to narcissism and pathological lying. We also discuss how to identify this behaviour, detach from these individuals and move forward from the emotional hangover created by gaslighting. All that and more, listen now!  Subscribe to our Patreon: https://patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s The article mentioned: https://www.asanet.org/wp-content/uploads/attach/journals/oct19asrfeature.pdf See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week on the podcast we are breaking down the psychology of our dreams - why we dream, the role of our brain, what our dreams mean, repressed desires, nightmares and even the role of daydreaming for our mental wellbeing. If you've ever wondered about your weird dreams, some of the scientific theories and whether you are a maladaptive daydreamer, this episode is for you as we jump into the fascinating science and psychology behind these imaginative, colourful hallucinations. Listen now!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.